Vote for Nessie
Apparently some 'fecking eejit' is taking the Scottish Government to court for allegedly breaching his human rights because, as a Scotland living in England somewhere, he doesn't have a vote in the independence referendum on 18 September 2014.
Now if you ask me, this chap must have too much time and money on his hands.
What does he expect that everyone of Scottish decent around the world should have the chance to vote Yes or No on whether Scotland should become an independent country?
If so, he's a complete plonker and the latest edition of Private Eye provides the perfect riposte.
MONSTER DEMANDS REFERENDUM VOTE
by Our Independence Staff
Jock I. Thenoo
The Loch Ness monster, one of the most famous Scots of all time, has demanded a say in the future of his homeland.
Even though the legendary monster, Nessie, now lives in California, he is passionate about Scottish independence.
He says, "I had to leave Scotland for professional and career reasons, but I long to rerun to Loch Ness when Scotland is free.
"Loch Ness is colder and wetter than California," he added, "and obviously it has a higher tax rate, but it's where my heart lies and there is nothing I would like more than to leave my swimming pool and go back to Scotland and a life of being seen occasionally in blurry photos."
Nessie, along with many other Scottish expatriates, is claiming the right to vote in the forthcoming referendum.
"Why should I not get a vote," he said. "I'm as Scottish as my neighbour and dear friend Mel Gibson."
